So for all those who serve, THANK YOU!

rb

Here is a 3 minute video of a "Soldier's Deck of Cards". The story is a couple of centuries old but the thought is still timely. Enjoy.

As big a pain as Arthur is, he reminds me daily of other painful lessons I am continually learning about leadership in the afternoon journey of my life. Here are a few:

1. I can no longer live the afternoon of my life with the same strategy as the morning program. What worked and made sense yesterday, won't cut it today. 
2. Specific tasks come with physical pain and I pay the price. No matter the pain or the price, it has always been worth it when it comes to doing "right" to others. Paradoxically, the pain and price have never been greater when I don't.
3. I am often awakened to the fact I have insulated myself with rationalizations about my abilities and strengths and haven't seen myself as clearly as I need to. Accordingly, I often have a flawed understanding of what it's like to live and work with me.
4. Uunderstanding my limitations mixed with grace helps me to grow. These two gifts grow in me exponentially as I extend those same gifts to others. I need to give more!

rb

Here is a two minute clip of me and my brother several years ago when we tried to send my mom a Mother's day picture (not). Enjoy.   

Mother's Day

It doesn't take long in the world of adults for many to act as if they are three years old. We all think we "deserve". Maybe we "deserve" because we've been with the company for years, or because we have more experience, have been more productive or "just because" (I love that one!). And then if we don't get what we 'deserve' we threaten to "take our ball and go home".

This 'deserve' infects teachers, firemen, managers, executives, and the teenager behind the counter at Taco Bell. But honestly, who hasn't thought they didn't 'deserve' more money, more respect, more time off, a bigger piece of the pie, more power, etc?

As leaders, "I deserve" is a dangerous place to be. Like a disease, it's ravenous, hungry and will eventually destroy our attitude and fill us with bitterness and resentment. Worse still, it doesn't just stay with us, it spreads throughout the people we lead and within an entire culture to destroy teams, businesses, and even an entire nation!

The most satisfied and best leaders I have ever worked with are not those who make leading about what they deserve but what they give. They remember leadership is a gift given to them by others; it is permission granted, not one demanded or 'deserved'.   

rb

Want a little drama in your life? Check out this 3 minute video. 

Either way a business decision is ultimately tied to making the smart people decisions.

When it comes to making a "business decision" or a "people decision" may I suggest doing a "risk" analysis. In both cases an important risk is one that involves timeliness. For example, in Texas during the spring we are always looking at weather radar to check out how long we have before a storm or a tornado might be coming in our direction. If we react too slowly, woe is me! However if we react with speed of recognition and determine possible outcomes from our decision, we are likely to make a more accurate one.

Why not do the same when making a "business" or "people" decision? I would venture to guess that one's failure to make a deliberate decision (whether business or people) in a timely manner, is directly correlated to the amount of turbulence and consequences caused. As the great basketball coach John Wooden stated,

"Be quick, but don't hurry." 

rb

For those who know me, know I enjoy doing Triathlons. This is a 10 minute video (worth the watch) of two young brothers, Conner and Cayden Long who participate in Triathlons in spite of Cayden having cerebral palsy. It will make your day.

I saw this from Bill O'Hanlon's email (www.possibil@aol.com) and several thoughts came to mind about staying comfortable:

1. Would America have ever been discovered?
2. Who would have signed the Declaration of Independence?
3. No one would have ever stood on the moon's surface.
4. I wonder if we would have ever eaten eggs?
5. There would not have been a sub-4 minute mile, someone standing on top of the world, electricity, Iwo Jima, Wittenberg Door, or Democracy.

I know there are more you can think of.

But maybe one of the greatest tragedies in life for being too comfortable is we never really live the life we were meant to live. That comfort to me has a name...regret.

Don't put off today what you think you will do tomorrow. Step out of the comfort zone and take a risk.

rb

 This video opens with a short introduction but it's worth the introduction and wait! You don't have to watch the full 7 minutes to get the idea of what breaking out of your comfort zone might look and feel like.

Stairway to Heaven (Tower Video)

Each day we make choices because we are not programmed robots. Here a couple I thought of:

1. Choose to open doors, not close them; build bridges, not burn them.
2. Choose conflict, not combat
3. Choose to forgive, not to hold grudges, especially when it comes to yourself.
4. Choose to manage your day, and not vice versa
5. Choose not to please "everyone", instead please the most important "ones".
6. Choose to give the benefit of the doubt.
7. Choose joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self control. They're called "fruits" for a reason.
8. Choose when it's all "said and done" there was more "done than said".
9. If asked to wait, Choose to wait patiently.

Enough for now. Share one of yours if you like.

rb

In our times when it's easy to get caught up in what's not happening in our schools with our students, check out this school in NYC.

Her most common five:

1. "I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me." This was the most common regret of all. Most individuals apparently had not honored even half of their dreams due to the choices they "didn't make".
2. "I wish I didn't work so hard." Guess which gender made this the most often? Every male patient she nursed made this statement. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship.
3. "I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings." While we can't control the actions of others, we  can control how we react to them.
4. "I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends." Often individuals would not realize the full benefits of old friends until their last dying weeks. Many had become so caught up in their own lives they were regretful about not giving friendships the time and effort they deserved.
5. "I wish that I had let myself be happier." Happiness is a choice, just like one's attitude. Let us never forget some of the simple rules we learned in kindergarten to let go, have fun, and smile more often goes a long way.

So choose wisely my friend. Take the time each day to stop and ponder what the priorities are in your life and not let the good push out the most important. One of the wisest men who ever lived summed it up this way, "A man may have a hundred children and live many years; yet no matter how long he lives, if he cannot enjoy his prosperity and does not receive proper burial, I say that a stillborn child is better off than he." Solomon

rb

Finally, check out this 3 minute video from last week's CBS Evening News of a man who truly learned how to live and is leaving a legacy with an entire town. Want to talk about Level 5 Leadership and a legacy! Make me more like this man!

He points out these pitfalls to avoid in leading characterized by most in congress. I have taken liberty with his ideas and added some of my own.

1. In all things, look for money first. Listen to the people with the most money, justify your actions around money. (Know of any middle class congressman?)
2. Be sure to embrace the fact you understand and are knowledgeable about everything.
3. Comprise over the most important issues and fight for the trivial. Whatever happens don't dare have a backbone!
4. By all means focus on the short run! Don't even consider leaving a legacy for others to follow because your "long term" is defined by "before the next election".
5. Blame somebody or something and don't dare take personal responsibility. You have got to learn to blame your predecessors. Follow the example of the leader of this country and leaders in congress.
6. When a difficult problem arises, duck, get out town, be on vacation, do anything but deal with it.
7. Ignore and grow deaf to passionate resistance. Don't even think of listening and considering what other alternatives there might be. (sbesides ee # 2 above)
8. Do business as usual. Ignore the examples of previous individuals who influenced and had a greater impact because they were not afraid to walk a hard path. For our nation I think they are referred to as our FOUNDING FATHERS!

Whew. Enough.

If you lead with these principles in mind don't ask for my assistance. I know you're not up to the challenge of making a difference. I'm only interested in individuals who desire to make an impact that leaves a path for others to follow outlined by character, integrity and a backbone.

rb

A sad day in the lives of millions of America today.

A quick thought on mistakes:

• Admit the mistake, apologize, make no excuses, learn from it, and don't become bitter or discouraged at your imperfections. Only one person has been perfect and that ain't you.

Of the things I think God didn't create, experiences and mistakes have to be two of them. Since He didn't make robots, it's up to us to learn from both. That will make a difference in our lives and the lives of others.

rb 

If you're not a parent or grandparent of a small child you can still appreciate the joy of being around their world of uncontaminated wonder. My grandson, while only 19 months old, is a "keeper". My wife and I had the joy of keeping him for an extended period of time this past week and to say that he is full of vim, vigor and vitality is an understatement! That boy runs on full throttle from the time he wakes up (except for his afternoon nap) and when he collapses in bed at night. He wears me out just watching him!

So what do little children and old Geezers like me have to do with leadership? It has to do with "neoteny". Neoteny from the Greek word, neos means "fresh, new or youthful." In Warren Bennis and Robert Thomas' book, "Geeks and Geezers" they said this about neoteny.

"Neoteny is the retention of all those wonderful qualities that we associate with youth; curiosity, playfulness, eagerness, fearlessness, warmth and energy. Neoteny is a metaphor for the quality-the gift-that keeps the fortunate of whatever age focused on all the marvelous undiscovered things to come."

So when it comes to leading others, let me be more like my grandson and neotenic.  I don't want to ever lose the vim, vigor and vitality in experiencing new things and challenging the status quo with  a superfluity of "why's?" I want to be the antithesis of a stereotyped old man who is unwilling to change or dream of "what could be". Let me be described as one who is always looking out the window with eyes of amazement like a child who can't wait to see what the possibilities of making dreams come true are.

May your leadership this year be characterized like a child who knows no limits! Leaders, like children, live in a world of limitless possibilities, full of curiosity, energy and confidence that the world is a place of wonder to be explored and grow in.

Maybe this is what the greatest leader who ever lived had in mind when he said "we must all become like a little child? Just wondering...

Have a great New Year!!

rb

While all other airlines have filed bankruptcy (except SWA), American Airlines tried to avoid following suit but to no avail. Mr. Arpey stood by his conviction because he believed filing bankruptcy was not only a financial decision but also a moral one. He couldn't be like other Wall Street executives or other CEO's who see filing bankruptcy as inherently moral. For this reason, he stepped down and left it all on the table, including any buyouts or financial gain.

As a leader, stand by your convictions. Be an example to others when it costs you, whether a position or job. For no matter what it may cost financially, the real cost for not standing up for what you believe in is an expense not worth paying for. Great men and women have stood by their convictions, and it not only cost them their jobs and positions, but their very lives. Stand strong!

Have a Merry Christmas.

rb

Enjoy this short video from people who live in the North.

Hallelujah Chorus - Quinhagak, Alaska

In 1827, the noted magazine editor and prolific writer Sarah Josepha Hale-author, among countless other things, of the nursery rhyme "Mary Had a Little Lamb"-launched a campaign to establish Thanksgiving a national holiday. For 36 years she tried to bring governors, senators, presidents and politicians together to be unified for one day of celebration and Thankfulness. Finally in 1863, Abraham Lincoln heeded her request, at the height of one of the darkest hours in American history, in proclaiming and pleading with all Americans to ask God "to commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife" and to "heal the wounds of the nation." As a result he scheduled Thanksgiving for the final Thursday in November.

With our nation once again enduring division not unlike previous Thanksgivings, is it not time to ask God to "commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers, and to heal the wounds of the nation?"

Make this Thanksgiving a day of thankfulness for what we have and not for what we think we deserve.

rb

For those leaders who want to understand graciousness in victory, gratefulness and perspective bigger than one's self check out the short interview with Coach K after becoming the all time winningest college basketball coach.

1. Wisdom.
2. Character.
3. Integrity which includes values and principles.
4. Self Awareness
5. Decisions made or not made.

Each one of these characteristics is the result of a disciplined and prudent life; doing what is right and just and fair.

Leadership, like one's attitude, is not a result of random circumstances, but how you respond to them, and the decisions you make on a daily basis.

Not sure you can do without one of the above characteristics and be a leader. What do you think? Maybe you can think of others?

rb

Leaders are influencers, challengers, new and fresh approaches to the future, people who encourage both individual and corporate significance with purpose followed by passion.

Seth Godin (www.seth@yahoo.com) mentions these ideas: "Managers get their employees to do what they did yesterday, but a little faster and a little cheaper. Leaders, on the other hand, know where they'd like to go, but understand that they can't get there without their tribe, without giving those they lead the tools to make something happen. Managers want authority. Leaders take responsibility."

Finally, Jim Collins in his new book, "Great By Choice" suggests Fanatical Discipline (Be Disciplined), Empirical Creativity(Creatively solve major problems), and Productive Paranoia (Be prepared for what you can't predict)" are part of the ingredients for a leader (along with humility and determination or will).

All of these ideas are nothing more than ideas, words on a page. Can you be both a manager and a leader? Absolutely. Which one if more effective? Depends.  Where companies, businesses and organizations get in trouble is confusing them with the responsibilities the position(s) requires. The result could be "status quo" versus "moving forward". And the real test  of effectiveness for a manager or a leader is not in words on a page, but in the examples lived out every day!  

rb

Finally, "The Most Important First Pitch of World Series History," a 4-1/2 minute video.

We are passionate people. Passionate about something. Most of the time it has something to do with what interest us, what we view as important.

Bored people are people without passion. People with no passion generally haven't found their purpose or have lost their sense of purpose. And sometimes the passion people have as individuals and the company they work for are not the same. When this happens you have disengaged employees.

If what you do 5 days a week doesn't bring a sense of fulfillment, excitement, or satisfaction, check your passion barometer.

Engaged employees are likely individuals who believe what they are doing is making a difference. They believe what they do and what their company stands for are closely aligned in purpose.

Questions to consider about yourself and your company:

1. What difference are you making as an individual or in the products/services you offer in the lives of others?
2. What would those closest to you or the customers/clients lose if you ceased to exist?
3. If someone asked you your purpose as an individual and then your company's purpose,  how closely would they be aligned?

Be about the business of living a life or building a company whose purpose is making a difference in the lives of others. 

Otherwise either find another company who is more closely aligned in purpose, be bored, or just go back to bed.

rb

"He who has a why to live can bear with almost any how." (Friedrich Nietzsche)

A quick 1 minute video of the difference between going to work on Monday and going home on Friday. Enjoy!

Friday vs. Monday

Friends are good medicine. Death rates for people with no close relationships is 2-5 times higher than normal.

Speaking for myself, I like me better when I'm with friends than I do when I'm by myself. And I like myself even more when I give part of me to others.

"If I thought I was going crazy I would find someone less fortunate than me and go help them out." Karl Meninger

We remember people for the impact they have made on us. So make sure you leave a great looking mark.

Our lives are made special because of the moments shared with others. Here are two moments, one less than 2 minutes long, the other only 4 minutes. Both capture how special people are, just like you and me. The first is a 29 year old woman from Burleson, TX who hears her voice for the first time. The second is a 4 minute video from Steve Jobs commencement speech at Stanford several years ago. While thinking he had been cured of cancer he reflects on the "single best invention in life".

Make every opportunity today a "special moment" to touch someone's life. It could be a smile, a helping hand, a kind word, a note of encouragement, a touch, a phone call or just a simple "thanks, that meant alot."

Leave that positive, great looking mark that will last forever.

rb

• Time
• Friends, family, relationships
• Antiques
• Money
• Employment
• Creativity
• Freedom

Let me give you one more, servant leadership. I love this quote from C. William Pollard, chairman of ServiceMaster;

"The real leader is not the person with the most distinguished title, the highest pay, or the longest tenure. The real leader is the role model, the risk taker. The real leader is not the person with the largest car or the biggest home, but the servant; not the person who promotes himself or herself, but the promoter of others; not the administrator, but the initiator; not the taker but the giver; not the talker, but the listener. Servant leaders believe in the people they lead and are always ready to be surprised by their potential. Servant leaders, make themselves available. Servant leaders are committed-they are not simply holders of positions. They love and care about the people they lead. Everyone is a leader and everyone can be a servant."

Seen any real leaders lately?

I just had to share this video I saw on Monday morning from CBS News. It's about 3 minutes and it is about the relationship of a firefighter in NYC and his son (who was also a firefighter) on and following 9/11. I love his attitude and response about tears. It's a good'n.

rb

But hold on...Mr. Hardy had not given me credit for the quote. Bummer. Now I wished I had not only said it (more than a thousand times) but actually written it down or published it in writing (other than a plaque that sits on my desk).

More important by far is what we both agree on about success and significance. It's not in the degrees you get, the cars you drive, the money you make, the business you own or lead that bring ultimate success. Why? Because sometimes you might achieve all of these things and still not feel fulfilled. And the real reason for the emptiness most people have? It is the confusion between success and achievment and significance and fulfillment.

"Like success is to achievement, significance is to fulfillment".  Dr. Ron Beasley

Like an ancient document I read every day that discusses "life under the sun", success and achievement are mostly about getting. It is a path or journey to find significance, to really make something of yourself and eventually be fulfilled. Success and achievement "under the sun" is often about "me first". "What can I achieve for myself?"  That is depressing, random and unpredictable. Significance and fulfillment on the other hand are concerned about what can I contribute individually and collectively to others so they can be impacted and come to know signficance and ultimately fulfillment.

"Life will never make sense in achievement  for the temporary but fulfillment for those things that last".

Dr. Ron Beasley

So, there you go. Almost had my name in a big time blog/magazine (which by the way is no big deal to me for those who know me!!). It's the message that is most important! 

rb

When does one "grow up?" When does an individual actually become "mature"?

I'm not exactly sure what maturity is but I think I know what immaturity looks like when I see it.

Could it be maturity is to be fully developed, complete and "grown up"? But does anyone ever achieve "maturity"? Does one ever "arrive"in becoming mature anymore than one can become "perfect"?

For me maturity is a consistent movement forward while at the same time a process of leaving behind childish and adolescent attitudes and habits. It's becoming more and more responsible for the decisions you make, the motives you have, the behaviors you evoke.

When I see someone who I think is mature I think of stability and the ability to replace extremes with security and confidence.

So what are the marks of maturity?

• Understanding other's perspectives
• Patience with yourself and others
• Humility
• Self discipline
• Compassion and empathy
• Confidence
• Perspective
• Perseverance
• I know there are others you could add.

Hmmm, interesting. Looks like the characteristics for maturity look like those for being a leader.

Amazing isn't it?

rb

1. How is it the exercise instructor is not in shape and yet leads a class to get in shape? (Thank God my spin insructor-Bonki- is not anything near that).
2. How is it that Roger Clemens can be tried for lying and it's a felony; but when Congress lies to us, they call it a decision in our best interest, when it's really politics?
3. How is it that when I disagree with someone's point of view I become their adversary? It can be anything from getting a raise or promotion to having a different point of view on male/female issues, black/white, war/peace, God/aethist?
4. How is it a leader can say one thing, but at the same time not walk the walk? For example, get caught up in managing and not leading?
5. How is it in public schools we cannot pray, but teach creationism?
6. How is it we can burn the American flag and it is justified by the first amendment?
7. How is it parents criticize teachers unmercifully for giving honest feedback when teachers spend 8 hours a day with their child and the parents might spend 4?

I guess I'm not in touch anymore...

rb

On another note I want to say thanks to Karrie who has been my assistant for the last two years (she leaves to have their second child). At the same time welcome to Leslie who already is doing a remarkable job.

And finally check out the new book from my assistant several years ago, Cindy Beall.

Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken:  Finding Forgiveness and Restoration

• Just because the world (or another person) is crazy doesn't mean you have to be.
• What got you to where you are today (or the people you work with) won't likely get you to where you need to be tomorrow (intrepetation for companies and individuals is you have to be constantly improving and reshaping).
• If you do it right the first time, you don't have to 'lick the calf over again'. (Texas slang for do it right the first time and you won't have to do it again).
• Leaders look out the mirror to apportion credit and in the mirror to apportion responsibility. Jim Collins ("Take the log out of your own eye before you take the speck of dust out of someone else's". Jesus)
• As the parents lead and act, the kids will follow and react. If the parents are reacting, the kids will likely be in chaos. (As leaders in a company lead, followers react. If the leaders are reacting, the followers are in chaos).
• A person's passion follows their purpose which is dictated each day by their priorities.
• There are times when each one of us "don't know 'come here' from 'sic'em'", so just admit it.
• Accomplishment substituted for fulfillment is disillusionment. Fred Smith, Sr.

Enough for now. Share one of your favorites if you so desire.

rb

On another note I wanted to share with you a link to a website that Bob Timmins, Sr. VP and Construction Partner for Jefferson Apartment Group in DC sent to me. He said it spoke to him about defining what is most important when it's all said and done.

When someone says something to you that's hurtful or they don't buy what you're selling, how in the world does one not take it personally? Maybe I haven't matured (as if that would solve the problem) but when someone disappoints me, I find it truly hard to not take it personally. I mean come on, even in elementary school and then graduate school when I got my grades or papers back there would often be a note on "my paper," "Ron, good ideas but you need more depth" (they didn't know I was drowning when I wrote it). Was that not personal? I mean it was my paper and that's my name.

So how does one not take things personally? A few thoughts;

1. It's about being grounded. I wish I could navigate the praise as well as criticisms of others. It's tough to deal with people you care about, and they simply don't respond in kind. Maybe part of the answer is  knowing who you are and who you're not? As much as I have always tried to be a pleaser, there are some people I will never please.
2. Maybe it's allowing others the freedom to be who they are and adjusting my expectations accordingly? I can change my truck's oil but I can't change others. I can choose to change me, but I don't have the power to change others.
3. And finally when others walk away or "decide to take their ball and go home," I have to remind myself it's their ball not mine. It's his or her agenda that is most important to them and that's tough to accept. But that's who they are. They have their lives to live and their world to live in, and they don't have to live in the world according to me.

However, when it comes to me personally I will take living with others and leading others intensely personal. When it comes to people I will always try to use my heart. When it comes to issues, I will try to lead with my head.

Just my thoughts. I would be interested in yours.

rb

Great 90 second seat belt video...enjoy and buckle up.

Both men are accepted to represent Great Britain in the Olympics in Paris. However, while boarding the boat to Paris, Liddell learns the news the heat he is to run in will be on Sunday. He refuses to run the race-despite pressure from the government and the Olympic committee-because his personal convictions prevent him from running on the Sabbath. I will let you decide whether or not to watch the movie to find out what happens.

The point of this blog is magnified in an article from Harvard Business Review (How Will You Measure Your Life by Clayten Christensen) where he reminded me there are a number of extenuating circumstances in life where one's personal integrity can be compromised. However, he states a truth to remember and live by,  "It's easier to hold on to your principles 100% of the time than it is 98% of the time. If you give in "just this once...you will regret where you end up."

Wow!

So here are a few questions to consider:

1. Are you the same person of integrity with your family as you are at work? Do you stand for the same things in your personal life as you do in other areas of your life?
2. When it comes to making decisions for your company, do you compromise your decision to do best for the company while also knowing it sends a message to your followers, "it's okay this time, it's different?"

At the end of the day, can you stand in front of a mirror and ask yourself, "Every decision I made today was made with integrity and my personal values and character were not compromised?"

Tough personal questions, answered honestly, build character.

rb

Words Of Wisdom: "Accomplishment substituted for fulfillment is disillusionment." Fred Smith

"I'm Popeye the sailor man, I'm Popeye the sailor man,

I'm strong to the finish because I eats me spinach,

I'm Popeye the sailor man!"

Want to know what your spinach is? Want to know what will help you to finish strong? Check out these two quotes:

When researchers look at what distinguishes happy people from less happy there is one factor that consistently separates the groups. The happy people are consistently in the presence of rich, deep, life-changing, meaningful relationships." The Journal of Happiness Studies

"Adherence to the idea of 'first who' might be the closest link between a great company and a great life. For no matter what we achieve, if we don't spend the vast majority of our time with people we love and respect, we cannot possibly have a great life." Good to Great

It's no suprise we don't get our strength from money, fame, position, or power. We get our strength from other people! It's about replenishing others so we can be replenished (from the wisest man whoever lived).

Know what another person needs to be replenished? The same thing you do; an encouraging word that builds relationships! It's a manager asking an employee "How are you doing?" It's one family member validating the other one by telling them they believe in them and know they will pull through. Whether it's a corporate culture or a family, how often do we encourage and catch others in doing good versus finger pointing and making disparaging remarks?

And lastly, in another study from the Gottman Institute it is reported that each of us receive 6 discouraging words a day for every one encouraging word. Decide this week to change that. Today, eat your spinach by encouraging someone else! Encouragement is a belief that the other person is important, genuinely significant, deserving your undivided attention if only for a few seconds. See if you don't become stronger and be replenished as a result of encouraging others and watch  others grow before your eyes!

Check out this short video clip on what happens when the right words are spoken (read by others).

Hope you're doing well... and hey, thanks for reading my blogs! I appreciate it.

rb

Cost is associated with price, and that price can be an outlay or expenditure of money, time, or sacrifice.

Worth on the other hand is more associated with the value, the importance of something.

Just because you pay more (cost) for something doesn't mean it's worth more. And just because I don't pay (cost) as much for something doesn't lessen its worth.

For example, there is not enough money (cost) in the world that could be paid for the person (worth) in this photo. In fact because of its worth, the cost is priceless! Ask his Poppa (me)!

The photo itself is digital and depending on where it's processed it wouldn't cost much at all. However, depending on who you talk to, this picture is worth far more than money can buy.

What's the difference between cost and worth? The true worth of something is in direct proportion to how much value a person associates with the cost. In our own minds we juggle the sometimes hard cold facts of costs with our subjective value of worth. The more value we place on something the more it's worth, and therefore, the more willing we are to pay with our time, money, and some times even our lives.

The challenge for leading others, working with others, motivating others comes down to the interplay between the two forces of cost and worth. Each one of us will make a distinction in following another (loving, being friends with, working alongside, parenting, or just helping another) when we believe the worth derived from doing so outweighs the cost.

Leaders have a way of assisting others to discover and believe the true worth of something far outweighs the cost. If they don't, those that follow won't be bought no matter the cost.

rb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWyCCJ6B2WE 

I hated the Wizard of OZ as a kid! It scared me to death especially the wicked witch of the West! Then there was the Wizard with his loud voice and big smoke screen. Both seemed so intimidating and yet, as we all found out, so fake and not what they were made out to be. The witch? She died from a splash of water. Are you kidding me? A splash of water? Geesh, so fragile. Then the Wizard was found out to be nothing more than a man from Omaha, Nebraska who hid behind a screen and was an "old blow hard."

When I think of leadership I wonder if those who lead really believe others will "pay no attention to the man/woman behind the curtain?" Who are we/they kidding? The most effective leaders are the those who are most authentic, most transparent. They understand they are watched at all times and "put their pants on" like we all do, "one leg at a time." The leaders who are most effective for their company, organization, and/or business live out of their own personal values first. If personal values are in conflict with the organization, there is no curtain to hide behind.   

And what are those most important core values? How about starting with, "who am I (really)?", "what do I really stand for?", "what do I really believe about the way people should be treated?" "What is important to me?" And finally, "When it's all said and done, what do I want people to remember about me?"

The truth is, at some point, the curtain is pulled back for each one of us to disclose who we really are. It's just a matter of time.

rb

Oh how wrong we are! While monumental acts of grace and courage are important so are the individual acts we do each day. Consider the impact of the following simple, yet profound gestures that have great impacts on others.

A handshake. "Thank-you." A smile. Tears. "Great job!" Please. "I love you." A hug.  Receiving a personal note of thanks through the mail. "Atta-boy!" "Don't quit." "I believe in you."

And I'm confident you can think of many more.

But see what I mean? Small. Individual. And yet each one can leave an impact on someone else we will never really realize. It doesn't take a lot of effort or time. Individual gestures can make all of the difference.

Don't wait. Today is the day to affect someone's life.

Take 4 short minutes to watch this volunteer firefighter remind us of an important fact about life. You will be glad you did. I promise.

rb

This past week I've talked with several people who have been extremely disappointed in one way or another with either the leadership in an organization or just people in general. And I caught myself several times saying, "If I were you...."

So what does, "Lane ends" and "If I were you..." have in common? We are all selfish and have no idea what we would do in someone else's shoes. Everyone else is selfish until they do it. "I know just how someone else feels" because I have been in a similar situation. That's a lie. I am selfish and I have never been in exactly the same situation as someone else plus my world view, my expectations, my values are what make me different than you. I can't be truly objective about any situation.

So the next time someone cuts you off or you're tempted to say, "I know just how you feel." Stop and understand what often looks like a people problem is more likely a situational problem. Give people a break because you are not them and don't see, feel, or understand just like they do.

Change places with the person who cut you off and then you get a better idea as to why they really are a jerk!   

rb

 This is a great commercial! It speaks volumes about life and relationships.

I had a similar experience with United years ago when trying to make the last connecting flight from California into Denver on my way home to Oklahoma City. Because of the weather, we were late in landing by a few minutes. After first being told by the flight attendant if they would not call ahead to see if they would hold my connecting flight, I ran through the terminal(s) and saw my ride back to OKC pulling away from the gate. "I'm sorry you missed your flight but you can find assistance at the customer service desk," the woman said. Much to my suprise a customer service desk was only two gates away!! However my disappointment and then anger boiled over when I arrived at the desk and was informed "they were closing for the evening and I would have to go to another terminal where I would find another customer service desk!" (I did ask him to define "customer service" but he declined...)

My impression? Don't ask.

My experiences with companies, businesses, or products over the years have had similar results. Because of their impressions, I refuse to do business with them unless I'm forced to.

But what about the impression you and I leave with people? Are they impressed enough to return? To follow us?  To stay in touch? Our experiences with people every day are just moments, sometimes literally fractions of seconds in an encounter which determines whether they are "impressed" enough to return or follow. Whether you are a CEO, a fellow team member, or even a mom or dad, what's the impression you're leaving? I'm not talking about after you're dead and gone but today? Right now? This very moment?

The impressions we leave become the memories made. So how are you doing?

rb

My sister sent me this 5 minute video that is incredible on the possibilities of what the future holds regarding the use of glass! Amazing.

As of December 2010 there are 3, 261 individuals still waiting on death row. Of that population, California has the most inmates waiting (697), and Texas is leading with the most executions (17). The average wait is 12 years from time of sentencing to execution, except in California where the average is 20 years!  The longest man served 33 years (from age 24 to 57) in Georgia before being executed in 2008.

This blog is not about arguing for or against execution but of similar characteristics many of us experience who are are in solitary confinement......

What happens to the psyche of the mind when the human touch and contact is taken away? Boredom, loss of a sense of reality, depression, anger, worry, bitterness, impaired concentration, stress, loss of dignity and self worth, loss of motivation with the idea of simply giving up.

Now multiply these characteristics across a population if individuals with no human contact and you get people who are overly sensitive and touchy, abrasive, rude, a loss of cohesiveness, disrespectful, and dissatisfied.

The alienation many individuals experience in a work setting is not from a lack of communication but of the wrong kind of communication. Today one-on-one, face to face contact time that requires both attention emotionally and psychologically is replaced with the plethora of emails, phone messages, text messages, Hey Tell, and on and on.

How many of us have received an email we have misconstrued (or was misconstrued)? Emails have no emotion other than the emotion the reader gives to it which is often not the same emotion the person sent it had. How many relationships have been damaged because two individuals didn't take the time, and energy to speak face to face?

Death row. Solitary confinement.  Both are really, really sad. Never thought about it in the context of  being within the walls of a company, an office, within a team and still more sadly for some within families and friendships.

Death row ends in execution. The solitary confinement we work and live in doesn't have to. All it takes is the real effort of human contact.

rb